Preface: this account is in no way to be a malicious critique of any projects that I’ve been involved with or the results which they produce. These are only thoughts that I have had along my journey.
The question that I’ve been wrestling with in recent months is something to the effect of “what is the best use of my time in regards to outreach and ministry in general?” This question was pushed to the front of my mind after listening to one of my favorite podcasts, Cradio (Catholic Radio). The subject was “how wonderful the good news is and our desire to share it with others” or, to be put another way, the idea that we are all called to ministry.” So this got me thinking about the times in my life that I am preforming properly and how truly wonderful those times are. I genuinely desire for all to experience that at some point in their lifetime.
“You don’t just feel good and run well unless you’re moving forward and upward” – Sam Walton (from the breakroom when I was employed at the wallyworld)
In effort to share this sentiment with those that might not have known it, I began researching different avenues that might bring that light. One group that found me through the local Jesus party was called “Car Guys Making A Difference.” This seemed right up my alley, since I’m a car guy.
The idea behind the group was something like “relational outreach via meeting needs in the community.” It seemed like a really good idea, and seemed very well thought out and backed by a non-profit group which had already been working in the community for years. It was intended not to be a hand out, but instead to be a helping hand working along side members of the community. It didn’t work as well as I imagined and I can’t seem to put my finger on why. The following ideas are theory as to potential reasons that these types of outreach are only marginally effective.
The community in which the non-profit operated is a government housing project. I imagine the culture (though possibly an incorrect idea) to be similar to that which is expressed artistically through hip-hop music, and I love hip-hop music. It is the genre, or at least has been, in which music that is inherently alpha is produced. Ideas and common themes of the hip-hop that I enjoy are “get money,” “what’s mine is mine and I’m going to take it,” ruthless and aggressive things of that nature. It really brings out all the things inside me that make me run with power in every step while I’m exercising. It’s quite refreshing after a day in the cube.
One question that I continually ask myself throughout our outreach efforts is “are we reaching men?” (The answer is usually no). Men are the leaders of the family. Men are the backbone of society. In order to have successful outreach, you have to reach men. In order to have a strong society, you have to have strong men. I’ve observed the majority of those from the community interacting with the outreach groups to be women. Why is that?
It may have something to do with the ideas uncovered by experiments that have studied resource distribution between groups of different gender. A group, composed of men, told to devise a system to distribute resources will almost always construct some form of merit based system. Women, on the other hand, are much more communal distributing resources in a socialist manner, an even distribution.
I believe that it’s rooted in the nature of men to despise handouts or anything that might even resemble the appearance of a handout. Social and government conditioning can certainly override this, but on an innate level I believe this to be true. Put simply, men want to be taught how to be strong. They do not want to be told that it’s ok to be weak. Even if they take the handout, it tears their hindbrain to pieces.
An outreach group offering an effective means to walk alongside members of the community, does not bring men in. Men do not reach back. Meanwhile, those that promise that which culture values will line people around the block. I see people spending their last dollar on all kinds of “investments,” “entrepreneur gurus,” and the like. I see people net less than minimum wage per hour to sell products legal and not. I can only imagine that they are chasing the promise of something greater. How do you compete with that?
You have to sell something with power and know what you’re selling. Believe in your product. People like Tony Robbins line people up to come to conferences and retreats. He knows what he’s selling, people want it, and he delivers. Christianity has a lot to learn from these types.
I’ve never viewed Christianity as a weak belief system. Being created in the image of god is one of the most powerful ideas that I’ve ever heard of. The idea that if you wrestle with god, the divine ideal, that you can constantly grow and become the best version of yourself. The idea that if you are truly doing the best thing for yourself that it’s simultaneously the best thing for everyone else since the best version of you is the version that gives most to the world. (Contemporary Christians word this idea “your cup must be full before you can pour out to others.” I don’t think that verbiage carries the same power.) The idea that sacrifice and the future are intimately related and the god of the universe gave the greatest conceivable sacrifice so that we may have the greatest possible future. These ideas have power. These ideas are a product that I believe in and want to share with people.
This train of thought is a slippery slope in the direction of televangelists. The beatitudes tell us that “Blessed are the poor in spirit.” This idea of selling a product and believing (And when I say believing in it, I mean knowing this system to be a certain reflection of how the universe operates. I mean having tested it and it held water in the worst conditions conceivable. I mean pure objective truth.) in it cannot be attached to monetary gain. It must be coupled with a vow of poverty, which is an unattractive idea at first. How do you present this wonderful realization of having something so much greater that money? “Take up your cross and follow me.” Walk in the footsteps of Jesus and emulate the divine ideal. That is greater than money.
These ideas are touched on in television programs such as Star-Trek or the more recent minimalist “van life” movement in the younger generation. I think they’re onto something with finding the appeal in that piece of the puzzle. Even those famous youtuber millionaires such as Alex Becker are constantly advocating for the benefits and freedom of existing without possessions. This is something that I am, and will most likely always, wrestle with in my own life as being a car guy is not conducive to living without possessions.
Somewhere in the muddy water that has been outlined by the ideas presented thus far, exists a way to to truly people. There is a truth that men have an innate desire to seek. Hopefully there is a way which I can find to share the brief glimpse of life while walking along that straight and narrow path. When you’re on that path, you know it and it is magnificent. It’s kinda like a riding a bike by yourself when compared to riding bikes with friends.
“Get a bunch of bikes and ride them around with your friends. It’s the shit” – Tyler The Creator